The Seven Mindsets of Basically Happier People

I was starting to lose faith in my own book - and was saved by a fifth grade teacher and her students.

Two years ago, my second book, Happier Made Simple, was released - to a flurry  of initial sales (International Best Seller on the first day, woot!), and then settling into the category of - well - let’s just call it occasional copies sold.

Such is the fate of many books published without a “traditional” publisher behind it, as my first book had been. These days, authors can choose to use their own power (and, often, money) to get the book out into the world with fewer strings and restrictions attached.

It’s a mixed bag.

I’m proud of Happier Made Simple, a book written in response to readers of my first, a memoir called Ben Behind His Voices, who asked how I stay “so positive” despite the trauma. I wrote it also for  those who told me, “I like books on happiness but they’re way too long and complicated.” So there, Oprah.

So I wrote Happier Made Simple with stories, action steps, some science, and an acronym (BREATHE) that sums it all up: Seven Core Phrases of mindset (self-talk) that, mixed and matched to whatever’s going on, get us through.

Since I wanted to keep it simple, I ran an excerpt of the book through the Hemingway app to see what its reading level was, hoping for high school or less.

It came back at a Third Grade level. Yikes! But okay…even better? I hoped so.

Still, the complicated books were outselling mine by far.

Yes, the book paid off in speaking engagements and interviews - but I’d be lying if I pretended it sells like hotcakes two years later. And since so many readers seemed to love the message, and wrote to tell me so, I still wanted the word to reach more people. But - well, PR isn’t easy.

So I channeled my best, “It is what it is”, and chose to move on to other projects. No regrets for trying. I’m glad I wrote the book. It’s out there for whomever might need its messages.

Then, yesterday,  I got an email from an elementary school teacher who reignited my passion- and the belief that the book does matter, that the acronym could be a way to teach mindset to our students earlier in life, for the sake of their mental health. 

She wrote:

I made a poster for my class. We discussed your idea of “happier made simple.” I told my little 10 year olds they won’t always be happy.

We are in the middle of standardized testing. 

We need to realize it’s Reality. 

We might not like it, but we have to Be here now (Being) and do our best. 

We get to test, so this is good, we have Appreciation. 

We all test, so we have Engagement with others all over the country. We have to Trust all will be well. 

We can handle the testing - we have the skills and Esteem. 

When all else fails, and we are asked something we don’t know, Humor…well isn’t that question interesting.

So, thank you!

Jackie

Wow. Those students are so lucky to have Jackie as a teacher. If these seven mindsets (wth easy reminders of what to say to yourself) can help ten-year-olds through the stress (and reality) of standardized testing, then there is value in reaching kids early with the messages of mindset and self-talk.

Just as Stephen Covey’s Seven Habits of Highly Effective People are sometimes used in schools as a fabulous guideline for actions,  for students to reach goals and attain success, I now can see the need for self-talk awareness to accompany those habits.

The Poster in the Classroom…BREATHE

And now, thanks to one e-mail from Jackie, I can see that I can help make that a reality.

I can see the Seven Core Phrases as a similar guideline for students to become more aware of their own inner messages, and have the tools to change them.

What a gift Jackie gave her students - and gave me.

If the Seven Core Mindset Phrases can help me through the ups and downs of adult life, including my son’s mental illness, then imagine how they could make a difference to our kids.

Let’s not wait for adulthood for our kids to learn about mindset and its effect on mental health.

I’d be happy to come to your school or company and share more about the concepts and how they work. Feel free to reach out at randye@randyekaye.com.

Thank you!