opening chapter, the book
This post updated January 28, 2011 - because the "right publisher" has come to us! Rowman and Littlefield will publish Ben Behind His Voices: One Family's Journey from the Chaos of Schizophrenia to Hope in August of 2011! Thanks to Claire Gerus for repping this, and to R&L for believing in it. Please go to www.randyekaye.com to sign up for updates on the book, or join the facebook group Ben Behind His Voices, the book.
Back then I wrote:
The right publisher will help bring hope and understanding to the many families – one out of every four, in fact – who live with mental illness every day.
A young man stands before you. Diagnosis: Schizophrenia.
Is the situation hopeless? No. Is his life worthless? Absolutely not. Is he about to pull out a gun and begin shooting? Despite what the media would have you believe, the answer is still no.
Did his family stand by, helpless and confused, as he fell into pieces bit by bit in ways they could neither understand nor control? Well - yes. Unfortunately, yes.
But is recovery also possible? Can the broken parts be pieced back together? Also – with education, support, acceptance, and love – yes. YES.
I will post excerpts from the book here on this blog, so that others may begin to hear the story. If you want to know more, please follow.
This is from Chapter One:
It’s the night of the Great Northeast Blackout, August 2003. I sit in the ER waiting room, watching my son Benjamin, 21, recently diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. He stares at his feet, mumbling to himself, possibly to voices only he can hear and whose existence he always denies. Ben glances up at me now and again, his lips in a faint smile but his eyes clouded and unreachable, and then returns to his inner conversation. Suddenly he looks up once more, this time to address the elderly woman seated in another hard plastic chair across from him, coughing violently.
“Excuse me, ma’am, are you all right?” Ben asks.
The woman smiles. “Yes, son, I’ll be OK. Thanks.” She takes a sip of bottled water; her coughing calms. Only then does Ben abandon the battle to stay focused on the outside world, and give in to the voices. Not until then does he return to his own internal world of psychosis. This, I can tell, is a relief for him.
He’s still in there, I thought. He is worth saving.
This was to be Ben’s fifth admittance to the psych unit in six months. It also marked the beginning of his recovery - and the start of my family’s road to acceptance of his illness. No Casseroles for Schizophrenia outlines that journey, from the bewildering and ultimately terrifying arrival of symptoms, through the crises of psychosis and hospitalizations, and finally to the “new normal” of recovery and hope.
Schizophrenia is arguably the most misunderstood mental illness; certainly no one comes to your door with casseroles when your child is hospitalized with this illness, especially after the first time it happens. But a person with schizophrenia is a person still worth loving – and that love helps immeasurably on the journey to recovery and acceptance.
All is not lost.
